Intimacy with Christ

Earlier this week I heard a mind-blowing message about intimacy. God desires great intimate fellowship with me. His desire is so strong, that He yearns to be to one with me. He uses earthly examples to explain this desire, such as the mystery of how a husband and a wife become “one flesh,” or how Christ is one with His bride, the Church.

“To them God has chosen to make known among the Gentiles the glorious riches of this mystery, which is Christ in you, the hope of glory.” Colossians 1:27

“I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can no nothing.” John 15:5

“And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Counselor to be with you forever—the Spirit of truth. The world cannot accept him, because it neither sees him nor knows him. But you know him, for he lives with you and will be in you.” John 14:16-17

“Don’t you know that you yourselves are God’s temple and that God’s Spirit lives in you? If anyone destroys God’s temple, God will destroy him; for God’s temple is sacred, and you are that temple.” I Corinthians 3:16-17

The sheer concept of Christ in me baffles my mind. But then I was hit with this idea: Because the Holy Spirit lives in me, and the Spirit is part of the sacred Trinity, then that means God loves me so much that He has brought me into the sacred God-head to be in direct relation with Him and Christ.

God has gone to unbelievable lengths to be one with me, to allow me the opportunity to be in relationship with Him and Christ…but how often do my words or actions say, “I’m sorry God, but you’re not enough for me?” This revelation was heart-wrenching. The book of Isaiah often refers to Israel—God’s chosen and holy people—as a prostitute because of her unfaithfulness to God, her groom.

As I was processing all of this information, I was forced to face the question: How many times do I prostitute myself? How often do I say ‘My God is not enough; He doesn’t meet all of my desires’?

Needless to say, this message has made me do some deep reflecting, and I’m not so sure I like what I’ve been seeing. My precious God should be more than enough for me. He’s done anything and everything for me…the most important thing being saving me from an eternal life without Him. He’s forgiven me more often than I deserve, and given me an abundance of blessings I don’t deserve. He loves me unconditionally. He has never left me, betrayed me, or broken my trust. He is ever faithful, loving, and just.

So why do I continue to prostitute myself away from Him?

Oh sweet Jesus, please forgive me for my unfaithfulness. I feel like the tax collector in Luke 18, who looks to heaven, beats his chest and has no words to say other than, ‘God, have mercy on me…a sinner.’

“But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was upon him, and by his wounds we are healed.” Isaiah 53:5

~joyfully broken

God's Not in the Magic Wand Business

A dear friend whose husband struggles with SSA shared this poem with me last week. It touched a raw place in my heart and I’ve been meditating on it ever since. So often I expect God to wave a magic wand and “Poof!” everything will be as I expect it. Then God gently reminds me that He’s not in the magic wand business; He’s in the deep healing business and that takes time, patience, and a never wavering trust in Him.

What We Need Most
What we need most is not to hear God say yes to our requests.
What we need is to be filled with such deep confidence
in the character of our Father that when He says no,
we know He is doing what is right and good for us.
What we need most is the faith to trust him.

Some claim that strong faith is defined by throwing our energies into
begging God for a miracle that will take away our suffering,
and then believing without doubting that He will do it.
But faith is not measured by our ability to manipulate God to get what we want;
it is measured by our willingness to submit to what He wants.

It takes great faith to say to God,
“Even if you don’t heal me or the one I love,
even if you don’t change my circumstances,
even if you don’t restore this relationship,
even if you allow me to lose what is most precious to me,
I will still love you and obey you and believe that you are good.
And I believe that you, as my loving Father,
will use everything in my life—
even the hard and hurtful things—
for my ultimate good and your eternal glory,
because You love me.”
~Nancy Guthrie~

“And we pray this in order that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and may please him in every way: bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God, being strengthened with all power according to his glorious might so that you may have great endurance and patience, and joyfully giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saints in the kingdom of light.” Colossians 1:10-12

~joyfully broken